10.) Bargantia (Folklore)
Folklore, while not a perfect game by any means, has some really awe inspiring bosses with some very unique designs. So how do you ruin that? By taking the worst kind of level [water level] and putting in a terrible boss. In this case, a freaking eel. All this thing does is swim outside of your range, fires projectiles that are extremely easy to avoid, and will occasionally swim close enough for you to hit. This is made even worse by what is ironically Folklore's greatest strength, the fact that you need to use a very specific Folk to attack Bargantia with, and the fact that Bargantia moves too fast for most of your attacks to hit. More than anything, this fight is long and boring rather than difficult or challenging. But this boss is more boring than badly designed, so it only gets number 10.
9.) Barthandelus ( Final Fantasy 13.)
That is a troll face if I ever saw one. You have to fight this guy three times [technically four, but the fourth time its technically Orphan's first form] he has a massive amount of health and high defenses meaning that each fight takes an absurd amount of time [ a half an hour at the bare minimum.] More than anything this boss is difficult not because he has a range of powerful attacks or spells, not because there is a very specific strategy you need, but because he takes so long to kill and it takes longer to beat him each time. And since the fights take so long if by some miracle you do die, you have to fight him all over again meaning this fight can take hours of you retrying the boss fight. And before anyone asks, why don't you just grind so you're overpowered? Well in Final Fantasy 13, up until 3/4th s of the game, you will only be able to grind to a certain point and then you wont be able to level up past a certain point until the last chapter. Even at max level for the first two times you fight Barthandelus you will have trouble and the fight will take forever. But like Bargantia, this fight is more boring than anything else. Just a half hour of pressing the X button, while occasionally selecting a different role. Riveting.
8.) Dr. Bumby AKA The Dollmaker [Alice: Madness Returns]
Oh look at that we're moving away from the boring bosses and into the uninspired. I love the American McGee Alice games, they're incredibly fun platformers [aside from the first game's vine segments.] and Madness Returns is one of the best platformers of the seventh console generation. Madness Returns just has some extremely imaginative levels depicting Wonderland and the ruin its falling into due to Bumby's influence on Alice's mind. And Bumby to his credit is a pretty good villian, wanting to brainwash Alice into repressing not only her bad memories but her very self so she can be, well, a lifeless doll. A boss fight with Bumby's incarnation in Wonderland seems like it would be just as fun and memorable as the Red Queen fight from the first Alice game. Well instead of that, you have to fight the same enemies you've been fighting the entire game, while occasionally dodging and fighting the Dollmaker's fingers. If that sounds lame then you're right, it is. This boss had so much going for it, great design, great idea, a reason to hate the villain, the fate of Wonderland hanging in the balance, and we fight fingers.
7.) Deadshot (Arkham Origins)
This boss was originally going to be a tie between Deadshot, Firefly, and Lady Shiva from Arkham Origins since all three of them were horribly executed. But in the end I had to give it to Deadshot simply because this fight could have been one of, if not the greatest fight in the whole game. Deadshot is one of, if not the most skilled marksmen in the DC universe. So let me throw the scenario I was imagining at you. You get shot at by Deadshot somewhere in Gotham. You need to utilize cover, and figure out where Deadshot is in the city firing at you and then make your way to him without getting killed. Sounds really tense and exciting doesn't it? Well too bad, the boss fight with him is a standard Predator encounter with the only difference being that his bullets can bounce off objects meaning he can hit you anywhere in the room. Oh and he's armored meaning he takes a few more hits than most enemies. and you have to deal with two groups of enemies. While making sure you remain undetected so he doesn't kill the hostages. Look at it this way, if you want a great Deadshot fight, play Arkham City. Rocksteady was able to pull it off much better.
6.) Haytham Kenway (Assassin's Creed 3)
And now we move from uninspired to the badly designed, and oh look a boss from the worst Assassin's Creed game. This fight is identical to pretty much every other fight in the Assassin's Creed series, you wait for your enemy to attack and counter attack immediately. the difference here? Well, your health is extremely low and the screen is constantly red meaning its hard to see. And since Haytham is extremely fast, chances are you're going to die a few times since you can't see him move, nor can you survive taking more than two hits. But its not just that this boss results in cheap deaths, its that this fight is supposed to be an extremely emotional fight between father and son, but it fails to hit that high point due to the terribly designed boss fight, and the fact that the story of Assassin's Creed 3 is boring and uninteresting.
5.) Brayko (Alpha Protocol)
Alpha Protocol despite all its problems is an espionage RPG that every RPG fan should try at least once. And Brayko stands high atop the many problems of Alpha Protocol as the worst boss in the entire game. Brayko wields two SMGs that cause extremely high amounts of damage, and sneaking up on him is next to impossible unless you can cloak. In addition when his health starts to go down, Brayko goes berserk and will chase you with a knife. You can't stun or slow him down while shooting him and if he catches up to you, he'll take a large chunk off your health and his attacks will stun you meaning you can't get away. As the fight goes on he'll go off to recover leaving you to fight endlessly respawning thugs one of which you'll want to keep alive since it means you won't have to fight a new wave of enemies. There are a few ways to make this fight easier like poisoning his cocaine for when he buffs himself, but these are optional methods to make him weaker, they shouldn't be something that is nearly required to beat the boss.
4.) Malacoda (Resident Evil: Revelations)
Out of any surprisingly good game that came out in 2013, the biggest one had to be the console port of Resident Evil Revelations. It hearkened back to the original Resident Evil games and aside from every section where you didn't play as Jill, the game was fantastic. Until you got to Malacoda, a giant infected whale. Enemies that are hard to kill in survival horror games are not inherently terrifying, they're just hard to kill. and firing rockets, Gatling guns, and every weapon imaginable at a giant monster does not make a good survival horror boss. This fight is a huge letdown compared to other great Resident Evil bosses because there is no tension in this fight. I didn't feel like I was fighting a Resident Evil boss, I felt like I was playing a worse version of Gears of War.
3.) Bed of Chaos ( Dark Souls)
Oh look we get to talk about the Bed of Chaos again. I hate this boss. Its a giant environmental hazard that you have to get lucky with in order to kill. Its completely dissapointing compared to other bosses in Dark Souls, and it goes against the entire philosophy of the games. No memorizing enemy attack patterns, just run from one side to another until you destroy both orbs, then make your way to the center of its body and kill a bug. And when you die? It won't be because the boss killed you, it will most likely be because the boss smacked you into a hole in the ground leading to an instant death. And you can tell From Software knew that this boss would be too difficult as it was, because once you destroy an orb it stays gone. There may be exploits to beat this boss easily, like being REALLY good with a bow, or just using Homeward Bones, but just because you can exploit a boss doesn't mean its not badly designed.
2.) Silver the Hedgehog (Sonic 06)
Yeah.... I just had to use this picture. It so perfectly captures the essence of what is probably the worst designed boss in video game history. When fighting Silver, he can use his psychic powers to grab you, hold you immobile, and then throw you dealing damage. The only time you can hit him is when he is getting ready to throw things at you. Doesn't sound so bad right? Well it wouldn't..... if Sonic 06 was a finished game. Silver can grab you in midair, throw you dealing damage, then when you fall, catch you again, throw you, etc etc. If you hit a wall, he can do the same thing. Worst of all if you do hit a wall, but catch a ring, you will be caught in an infinite loop since you always have at least one ring while Silver continually catches you and throws you into a wall. All while hearing that same line over and over again. The reason this fight isn't number 1 though? Well you get to play as Silver later on, and its VERY fun to do to Sonic what Silver did to you.
1.) Wargoyle ( Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance.)
The Kingdom Hearts series is every Disney fan's dream as you are able to fight some of the greatest Disney villains with one of the best combat systems seen in a hack and slash game. In Dream Drop Distance you are able to visit the world of the Hunchback of Notre Dame, aka people thought Frollo or at least a manifestation of the darkness in his heart would be a boss. Just picture that for a moment, Frollo, one of Disney's darkest, most complex villains having his dark desires manifested in the form of a monster you have to fight. Expecting some fiery hell-fire angel? Nope, you fight a rainbow colored fruit bat instead. This fight is made even worse though by the fact that since you can only gain abilities by bonding with your Dream Eaters [ Think of it like a Tamugachi pet] chances are that you won't have any good abilities like Leaf Bracer, which you will need. Not to mention this boss has a large amount of health for only being the second boss, at least four bars worth and you won't be able to deal any significant damage to it. This boss encompasses everything on this list, the fight is boring because of its lame appearance, its overwhelmingly difficult for such an early part of the game, its wasted potential from what could've been a great boss fight, and you have to fight this thing three times.
Hope you enjoyed this list, now if you'll excuse me, Dark Souls 2 is waiting.
Red Vulture out.
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